“I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and the new.” That quotation by Ralph Waldo Emerson inspired this column. So while I’m eternally grateful for my family and the love, support, and encouragement they unceasingly give, I’m so very thankful for friends, old and new.
I have longtime friends from childhood; middle school, high school, college; early career; former students now friends. We may not see each other often; but when we do get together, it seems like no time has passed…until we start talking about grandkids, aches and pains, medical tests and procedures. You know what I mean.
And then there are other friends I’ve added while on life’s journey.
People who love books the way I do have become friends. Literati, a book club I’ve been with since 1997, contains former colleagues from my early teaching career and others we’ve welcomed over time. Some of us know each other well and have shared joyous occasions and sorrows. LARK, a more recent book club whose name reveals our first initials, are dear friends who relish the intimacy of our quartet of readers and often talk more about what’s going on in our lives than what’s going on in our book. That’s what friends do.
Weight Watchers has been in my life for many years, many pounds. When I lived in Adams County, WW met at the hospital; when I moved to Wells County, I dropped my membership. After we made Warsaw home and out of a need to get back on the losing track, I rejoined. My Decatur WW coach also serves Warsaw. She has the ability to turn a group of strangers into friends/family. That Warsaw WW family has been part of my circle of friends before and through Covid; during my 2021 breast cancer journey; through recuperation from a broken hip in 2022; and during my most recent scare involving an MRI, double biopsy, and news of “no evidence of malignancy identified.” They have encouraged, supported, and cheered me. That’s how friends act.
More recently I’ve joined a group at the local YMCA, Joyful Joints, where we train joints and muscles to work better together while recovering from and dealing with injuries, breaks, arthritis. When you spend two hours a week with individuals in swimsuits in a warm-water pool doing moves called “rocking horse,” “boy frog”/“girl frog,” “cross-country skiing,” to name a few, you let your guard down and open up to potential friends. They’ve celebrated with me my renewed ability to cross my legs and raise my right leg to put on shoes and socks. Our fearless leader, a certified Water Fitness Instructor through the Arthritis Foundation, brings us together twice a week to move, stretch, share stories, laugh, and become better acquainted. An occasional gathering at a local eating establishment gives us a chance to gather with clothes on, most recently with Halloween costume accessories. That’s how friends roll.
I would be lost without my Sisters in Heart, my Bible study buddies. What a loving, giving, prayerful group of women. Besides studying the Word, we’re currently watching THE CHOSEN, season 3, and discussing episodes a week at a time. Sharing praise for prayers answered and offering requests for current needs occurs weekly. That’s what friends are for.
In September I joined another group. A dozen of us are training to become Stephen Ministers to serve Warsaw Community Church. We meet Tuesday evenings for two hours, totaling 50 hours of training from mid-September to mid-January. We’re lay people learning “to provide one-to-one care to hurting people in the congregation and community” (from a media fact sheet), to walk beside someone who’s facing a crisis or difficulty, perhaps something we’ve experienced in our own lives. In less than two months we’ve shared a lot about our own histories and have become quite connected. I consider my prayer partner a friend already. We will all grow closer as we get to know each other better through training, later serving, and then sharing our dilemmas and successes. That’s how friendships develop.
I couldn’t write a piece about gratitude for friendships without mentioning the motley crew of “Here’s the Thing” writers. You know who they are: some you probably have known much longer than I and have long considered them friends. I envy you. There’s something about exposing yourself through your writing and asking for feedback that bonds a writing group. You get to know way more about a person than his or her writing style and writing process and go-to topics. And while I’ve known some of these writers (including those who no longer write with us) for a long time, I have enjoyed getting to know the others. I am grateful to call them friends.
Here’s the Thing: Life is full of opportunities to develop all levels of friendship. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.” Look for those footprints as you eat with your breakfast buddies; as you strive to achieve goals with those in the clubs, societies, and associations to which you belong; as you enjoy a game of golf or chess or pickle ball with an opponent; as you participate in groups that play cards or bingo or make quilts. Some of those footprints will be deeper than others; every one of them deserves to be celebrated.
Let’s talk.
annaspalding1956@gmail.com
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Editor’s Note: This is one of a series of articles written by a group of retired and current teachers — LaNae Abnet, Ken Ballinger, Billy Kreigh, Kathy Schwartz, and Anna Spalding. Their intent is to spur discussions at the dinner table and elsewhere. You may also voice your thoughts and reactions via The News-Banner’s letters to editor.
